After my holiday, I’ve had a rest from all forms of exercise as I had a lot going on in my personal life and an inner ear infection affecting my balance.
Yesterday I found the courage to get back to Crossfit.
Yes, courage was needed.
I find that a month away and I feel nervous to return, worried I can’t do anything, scared I’ll fail. The thing is, deep down I know there’s never anything to worry about – the people are like extended family and there’s nothing to ‘fail’ as turning up and doing the wod is the only goal!
So after an EMOM of 10mins doing 3 x squat cleans at a nice easy weight of 30kg, followed by 100 wall balls with another nice easy weight of 5kg and 100 box jumps, over 10 rounds of 10 each per round… I thought I had eased myself back in well. Didn’t push it, kept it nice, but still worked up a sweat.
This isn’t what my legs said today!
I have spent the day on my sofa, with the occasional trip to the kettle or the bathroom… legs were ever so slightly sore!
However, today is Thursday and I promised myself I would return to plodders tonight.
A cold, dark, wet night and rumour is its a ‘Penn Lane’ night (hills).
My legs are aching and yet I was excited to pull on my shorts and get over to the meeting point.
I was a little nervous, but more excited to see everyone.
(I’m the one in shorts looking excited in a room full of of people dressed up warm for the November weather!)
A quick catch up with everyone, then we were off for what turned out to be a fantastic night!
It was dark, the roads were wet and slippy with the Autumn leaves on the ground… a fantastic setting for Lou (our leader) to show the ninja skills she keeps a secret… Was it a fall? Was it a roll? Was she trying to cross the road in a way Ethan Hunt would be proud of?! Whatever it was, it certainly provided some entertainment for us to watch, probably a few bruises for Lou though and yes… we probably could have been a little more sympathetic 😂
The hill work we did was fun. Yes, I said fun!
I do love bouncing up hills.
Even though my legs were like jelly from last night, I just kept going and remembering the first time I ran that hill it was horrendous. My back ached, my determination ceased to exist and I had no belief in myself. Fast forward less than 3 months and I’m excited to run it, full of determination and I’m finally in control of my body.
My brain an no longer tell my legs to stop because ‘it can’t be bothered’ or because ‘they will never make it, so what’s the point’ and if it tried to, my legs know they can just keep moving and the rest of the body will push on with them. I run now because I know I can. I’ll stop when I can’t run, not when I don’t want to run. My brain and body are working together and that’s a nice feeling.
I just need to keep challenging that link with some longer distances and some off road running to keep my mind active too. My body needs to keep proving to my mind what it’s capable of.
Self doubt is something I’m sure a lot of us are guilty of. Sometimes we let it eat us up until it becomes ‘fact’ in our minds ‘I can’t …’ and we believe that so much, we don’t even try. We give in. We believe the self doubt and the fear. How can we say ‘I can’t …’ without attempting it? Most of the time, when we attempt something, we realise we need to change the ‘fact’ to ‘I can …’
This is something I am trying harder to do everyday.
It was the main reason for this blog and what started this journey.
‘I can’t run 3 miles, let alone 13.1 miles’
Well, I can run 3 miles… I’ve run it several times… I can run 6 miles, done that a few times now… and I’m pretty sure with a bit more training I CAN run 13.1 miles in May next year!